Presently (as you measure)

A mind
with, but not of

/////

Progressing down streets
Mind always on dirt roads out of sight
Mind boxed by concrete
(Eyes fixed on the sky)
(Love in my pocket)
(Love brushing my cheek)
Hurt between my shoulder blades
Don't look side to side, I hear
and I cover my ears
and close my eyes
and bow my head and hurry on.

Feeling love grasp at my shirt
I'm torn... I want
I can't my understanding says ; stern dwindling and miserable
I can my hope says "but" ; howling cutting and infantile
I turn around, covering my face, and feel love envelop me
I melt, I draw hope in swallows, I want to try again again


I was born of hope.
...really
I came, made of fierce brightness and blazing serenity
I lived, quiet smiles and depthless darkness of
                                hope, passion, clarity, mystery, certainty, love of all, life
Then it condensed. and now it's encased in a. loaf of stone
A starcoal that never extinguished
My precious heart
Safe but sealed away
Mine, but not free
I can let it out, but I am entombed it
ironic

                ("trapped in absolute uncertain freedom"?)

Growth all slow expansion
That's how cracks happen

/////

The world spinning with wonder
sharp cold as I plunge
water droplets, hot
Because I breath
Because I know
Because I see Because I live
Because I truly love
And for every burn I bleed
Showing that inside it is intensity barely contained
                by skin
                by normalcy
                by expectation
                by cautiousness and fear of
                                societyfuturestraightandnarrow
                                what I've been told
                                cardboard worlds that are supposed to be approximations

                                Other whispers it isn't so
                                cardboard walls have openness behind
                                world is wider, vaster
                                brighter, bursting, I fill in, imagine

Pull back
"maybe"
always cagey

/////

eyes down, hidden hope
cupped hand holding dreams
sitting alone
whispers wrapped around me
We are both cold and warm, alternating
We are both light and dark, alternating